Regrets

There were times when I have the opportunity to talk to you,
I should have just grab the chance.
But I didn't.
Now I regretted it.
Very much.
I really miss you when you are not around anymore.
I wanted to say, I love you mum.
Always.

17th January.

17th January.

We remember the date clearly.

It was your birthday.

We've bought you flowers and lit some candles.

We've placed the flowers whereas you wish it to be.

We prayed that you will always protect us, like a guardian angel.

We want to wish you, Happy birthday.

And say, Mama. We love you always.

The 100th Day...

I've been thinking a lot lately,
Yes, Thinking of you almost everyday,
Until I nearly lost count of the 100th day,
And tomorrow... is that the 100th day. 

Thinking of seeing you again in my dream tonight. 
Like how Zing told me she dreamt of you walking by. 
Recalling back to the dream I dreamt of when I slept right beside you and held your hands tight. 
In that dream, you were wearing the pink blouse and a blue long pant.
With that smile on your face...
Waving goodbye to me before you disappeared. 

I hope you will come into my dreams again.
And tell me you are doing fine. 
Tell me, you love me too. 
Tell me more like how you usually do, before you wave goodbye and walk away. 

I know i've been hoping too much. 
I know I've been thinking of you too much. 
I know that, but with this little hope, I hope God will grant my prayer.
That is to be able to see you and to be with you again for one last time in my dream tonight. 

I really miss you. 
You know I do. 
You know we all do. 
And we always will. 
For we all know, you miss us too.
I love you, mama.  

I Will Always Love You.

Everyday,

I asked for God to light the way,

May God light the way and free her pain,

And God did light the way for my mother.

I slept beside her and held her hand,

She came into my dream and called my name,

She looked at me with a smile and said goodbye,

I said goodbye too, knowing that I could no longer hold your hand.

Zing played the song, "In the arms of an angel" ,

May the song give you the comfort,

"It is okay to let go" kept repeating in my heart,

And may you go in love and peace.

She once told me, "Do not weep for me when I'm gone",

The moment you let go of your last breathe,
I tried my best to hold my tears and prayed,
And I thanked God for coming and leading you home.

I will always love you, mama...

and

May God hold you tight in the palm of His hand.

Nothing.

I don't know how I feel,

My feelings just stop feeling anything that hits me right now.

Singing my lullaby...

LOL...